Multiple visits to multiple doctors which said I was fine, also I ordered some lab tests to be taken but all was normal... Interesting.
However I just briefly noticed that there seems to be lack of smell + there is too much blood sugar (own tests), even when accordingly to my own measurements there should not be!
=> I'm again really worried about my overall health. I will try to see public heath care services instead.
Blood sugar: around 7 when waking up. Also my hands are turning more and more into color.
lauantai 26. helmikuuta 2011
torstai 27. tammikuuta 2011
Visited doctor today
Visted doctor today again.
I asked what to do, he suggested starting and SSRI. I asked whether seroquel could be raised or something put he wasn't very supportive otherwise. Anyway, I cannot understand why should I need SSRI. I asked about Pregabalin and whether that could help, he wasn't very supporting.
Also described that my nervous system was overactive and need to be calm down. Not exactly good approach. He also said that there was something (cholesterol etc?) that overactive nervous system seems to cause problems with blood veins and stuff and that it cannot be seen on standard blood tests.
Not feeling vey well today. Now there is again some tinnitus. Maybe one should return to Zyprexa as fast as possible? If Zyprexa discontinuation caused trouble then it might be good approach.
=> I'm going to public health system and see what they can be do to me.
I asked what to do, he suggested starting and SSRI. I asked whether seroquel could be raised or something put he wasn't very supportive otherwise. Anyway, I cannot understand why should I need SSRI. I asked about Pregabalin and whether that could help, he wasn't very supporting.
Also described that my nervous system was overactive and need to be calm down. Not exactly good approach. He also said that there was something (cholesterol etc?) that overactive nervous system seems to cause problems with blood veins and stuff and that it cannot be seen on standard blood tests.
Not feeling vey well today. Now there is again some tinnitus. Maybe one should return to Zyprexa as fast as possible? If Zyprexa discontinuation caused trouble then it might be good approach.
=> I'm going to public health system and see what they can be do to me.
keskiviikko 26. tammikuuta 2011
Its getting worse
Visting my parent's place. It is becoming apparent that the private doctor who OKeyed:
Zyprexa 15mg -> Seroquel 200mg aboutish wasn't very nice.
Additional detail: erection problems + tinnitus + yesterday problems.
I'm otherwise quite OK.
Managed to understand the root of the problem:
glutamateric disinhibition: too much glutamate running around. Solutions: block dopamine: can kill you (glutamate gets around now too).
Other: creatine, BCAA, B-vitamin.
Really like how I got proper treatment and "helped" by various doctors. Anyway, I guess only hope is to raise dopamine blockade slowly. Other is apparently: lamictal.
Zyprexa 15mg -> Seroquel 200mg aboutish wasn't very nice.
Additional detail: erection problems + tinnitus + yesterday problems.
I'm otherwise quite OK.
Managed to understand the root of the problem:
glutamateric disinhibition: too much glutamate running around. Solutions: block dopamine: can kill you (glutamate gets around now too).
Other: creatine, BCAA, B-vitamin.
Really like how I got proper treatment and "helped" by various doctors. Anyway, I guess only hope is to raise dopamine blockade slowly. Other is apparently: lamictal.
tiistai 25. tammikuuta 2011
Blood pressure and circulation system
There seems to be something wrong with my circulation system.
Yesterday there was situation that was a kind of heart attack and today I measured 164/92 and pulse 163.
I went to visit a hospital where they measured the situation and it seemed to be almost OK. somehow fresh air and moving seems to help.
I must go to hospital again if things doesn't get better.
Yesterday there was situation that was a kind of heart attack and today I measured 164/92 and pulse 163.
I went to visit a hospital where they measured the situation and it seemed to be almost OK. somehow fresh air and moving seems to help.
I must go to hospital again if things doesn't get better.
Update
After getting basic blood work test done it seemed show that there were no problems.
What is missing however are liver /tests such as ALAT, must get these done.
Also there seems to be wierd odour in blood every now and then I wonder what causes it.
What is missing however are liver /tests such as ALAT, must get these done.
Also there seems to be wierd odour in blood every now and then I wonder what causes it.
Urea tests
Luckily my urea tests doesn't show anything very bad going on.
But there are other places which can be malfunctioning also. Also there is this tinnitus in my head. Really had to try to find doctor and ask some high dopamine blocking agent. AFAIK, over sensitive dopamine receptors kills you slowly.
But there are other places which can be malfunctioning also. Also there is this tinnitus in my head. Really had to try to find doctor and ask some high dopamine blocking agent. AFAIK, over sensitive dopamine receptors kills you slowly.
maanantai 24. tammikuuta 2011
Blood sugar levels
My blood sugar levels seems to be around 6-7 and not going down..
Scary. Seeing doctor tomorrow and hopefully there is something that can be done. Also starting Seroquel XR 200mg tomorrow.
Almost went to hospital because I felt like dying, Some kind of heart palpations etc. something very wrong in my system.
Scary. Seeing doctor tomorrow and hopefully there is something that can be done. Also starting Seroquel XR 200mg tomorrow.
Almost went to hospital because I felt like dying, Some kind of heart palpations etc. something very wrong in my system.
About Seroquel withdrawal (DO NOT DO IT)
It is quite clear that after Zyprexa 20mg and because of my current condition I'm stuck with medicines forever.
However, the problem with Seroquel is that if Seroquel INSTANT-RELEASE: low dose is used this keeps opening and closing the receptors and apparently causes fluctuations in blood vessel thinning and closening. This again destroys your internal organs because of there is too much fluctuations between adrenaline blockade that control blood vessels. Because of this Seroquel XR 200mg is maybe (I can be wrong!) the only correct drug here. Also, when you withdraw with Seroquel IR 400mg/night you must keep your seroquel levels STABLE so that adrenaline blockade doesn't fluctuate and cause problems. (Seroquel 50mg - 250mg is adrenergic blocking range). During withdrawal one should continuously use oxygen mask or something (exercise isn't good because it increases adrenaline and draws blood AWAY from your organs). => Adrenergic blockade should be withdrawn with low dose of Risperdal which has LONG half-life and should be super-slow. Or using Seroquel IR MANY times during a day (you really need seroquel XR 50mg tables or something). Adrenergic receptors must desenstize so the withdrawal must be SUPER slow (year from Seroquel 200mg to 0mg).
Another issue is the high dopamine blockade from which there may not be easy solution. Once dopamine receptors are upregulated they don't down-regulate so easily (as does nothing, brain ages) and they cause NMDA receptors to malfunction which causes glutamate toxicity which keeps killing brain cells. Because of this the withdrawal from dopamine should be slow too. Medicines with short half-life are disasterious (toxic) here too, dopamine blockade changes causes glutamate built-ups which keeps damaging brain cells.
=> Seroquel levels MUST BE STABLE. Fluctuations in binding kills you.
Based on this the correct withdrawal from seroquel 400mg/night would be (I can be wrong!):
Seroquel 400mg/night (LOTS of exercise)
Seroquel 200mg/night, Seroquel 100mg/morning, 25mg/day
Seroquel 150mg/night, Seroquel 75mg/morning, 25mg/day (LOTS OF OXYGEN, no-adrenaline)
Seroquel 100mg/night, Seroquel 100mg/morning, 25mg/day
Seroquel 50mg, 4 times a day
Seroquel 25mg, 8 times a day?
Seroquel 0mg
Withdrawal should be SLOW and levels should be super stable. Little adrenaline and maximum oxygen to internal organs. Alternalive (BETTER!) option would be to switch to low dose of risperidone and withdraw with it.
If withdrawal is handled incorrectly IT KILLS YOU. Medicines with short-life times are DANGEROUS because too rapid fluctuations in receptor bindings and brain (and blood vessels) cannot handle too fast receptor binding changes (happens within 24 hours). Instead, the withdrawal must happen over course of several months or years. Direct reduction of seroquel IR (and prolong) doses KILLS YOU, seroquel must be taken many times a day. Especially with low-doses.
However, the problem with Seroquel is that if Seroquel INSTANT-RELEASE: low dose is used this keeps opening and closing the receptors and apparently causes fluctuations in blood vessel thinning and closening. This again destroys your internal organs because of there is too much fluctuations between adrenaline blockade that control blood vessels. Because of this Seroquel XR 200mg is maybe (I can be wrong!) the only correct drug here. Also, when you withdraw with Seroquel IR 400mg/night you must keep your seroquel levels STABLE so that adrenaline blockade doesn't fluctuate and cause problems. (Seroquel 50mg - 250mg is adrenergic blocking range). During withdrawal one should continuously use oxygen mask or something (exercise isn't good because it increases adrenaline and draws blood AWAY from your organs). => Adrenergic blockade should be withdrawn with low dose of Risperdal which has LONG half-life and should be super-slow. Or using Seroquel IR MANY times during a day (you really need seroquel XR 50mg tables or something). Adrenergic receptors must desenstize so the withdrawal must be SUPER slow (year from Seroquel 200mg to 0mg).
Another issue is the high dopamine blockade from which there may not be easy solution. Once dopamine receptors are upregulated they don't down-regulate so easily (as does nothing, brain ages) and they cause NMDA receptors to malfunction which causes glutamate toxicity which keeps killing brain cells. Because of this the withdrawal from dopamine should be slow too. Medicines with short half-life are disasterious (toxic) here too, dopamine blockade changes causes glutamate built-ups which keeps damaging brain cells.
=> Seroquel levels MUST BE STABLE. Fluctuations in binding kills you.
Based on this the correct withdrawal from seroquel 400mg/night would be (I can be wrong!):
Seroquel 400mg/night (LOTS of exercise)
Seroquel 200mg/night, Seroquel 100mg/morning, 25mg/day
Seroquel 150mg/night, Seroquel 75mg/morning, 25mg/day (LOTS OF OXYGEN, no-adrenaline)
Seroquel 100mg/night, Seroquel 100mg/morning, 25mg/day
Seroquel 50mg, 4 times a day
Seroquel 25mg, 8 times a day?
Seroquel 0mg
Withdrawal should be SLOW and levels should be super stable. Little adrenaline and maximum oxygen to internal organs. Alternalive (BETTER!) option would be to switch to low dose of risperidone and withdraw with it.
If withdrawal is handled incorrectly IT KILLS YOU. Medicines with short-life times are DANGEROUS because too rapid fluctuations in receptor bindings and brain (and blood vessels) cannot handle too fast receptor binding changes (happens within 24 hours). Instead, the withdrawal must happen over course of several months or years. Direct reduction of seroquel IR (and prolong) doses KILLS YOU, seroquel must be taken many times a day. Especially with low-doses.
Strange (seroquel XR)
I finally managed to get Seroquel XR 200mg recipe which I will started use. I also got some proper blood tests done in a lab and it is interesting to see what they say about my blood sugar levels.
My own measurements seem to show that my blood sugar levels are between 5.5 - 7.5. Clearly eating chili is very bad thing because it seems to
This is clearly quite high, the only good thing is that I now know more stable seroquel levels should help because they should increase blood flow to organs and keep veins open which is probably one reason for problems. (Seroquel opens and closes adrenaline receptors that cause vasocontriction). This also seems to explain why tinnitus is worse before going to sleep (seroquel levels are the lowest). Also lots of fresh air is good too.
I have also switched to non-sweets, vegetable (salads) based diet to control my blood sugar levels.
Completely another problem is dopamine receptor oversensitivity that probably kills me slowly. Excess dopamine activity causes NMDA receptors to malfunction leading to glutamate overtoxicity. After visiting multiple doctors one doctor proposed to start using antidepressant. This could probably work but it is clear that it is impossible to stop such treatment: 5-HTP and tryptophan supplements rule the day for at least week now.
Oh, and I really like to thank all the helpful people (mostly the doctors) who didn't want to educate me about the proper use of seroquel/neuroleptics. Only when I realised most of the information regarding neuroleptics and antidepressants in net is somewhat hmm.. misinformative, I did search for relieable sources and managed to understand the big picture.Especially, I like give thanks to the nice doctor who withdraw my seroquel levels down to 100mg/night proposed that I would keep using that dose for 6 months. Unluckily, this plan didn't work out.
My own measurements seem to show that my blood sugar levels are between 5.5 - 7.5. Clearly eating chili is very bad thing because it seems to
This is clearly quite high, the only good thing is that I now know more stable seroquel levels should help because they should increase blood flow to organs and keep veins open which is probably one reason for problems. (Seroquel opens and closes adrenaline receptors that cause vasocontriction). This also seems to explain why tinnitus is worse before going to sleep (seroquel levels are the lowest). Also lots of fresh air is good too.
I have also switched to non-sweets, vegetable (salads) based diet to control my blood sugar levels.
Completely another problem is dopamine receptor oversensitivity that probably kills me slowly. Excess dopamine activity causes NMDA receptors to malfunction leading to glutamate overtoxicity. After visiting multiple doctors one doctor proposed to start using antidepressant. This could probably work but it is clear that it is impossible to stop such treatment: 5-HTP and tryptophan supplements rule the day for at least week now.
Oh, and I really like to thank all the helpful people (mostly the doctors) who didn't want to educate me about the proper use of seroquel/neuroleptics. Only when I realised most of the information regarding neuroleptics and antidepressants in net is somewhat hmm.. misinformative, I did search for relieable sources and managed to understand the big picture.Especially, I like give thanks to the nice doctor who withdraw my seroquel levels down to 100mg/night proposed that I would keep using that dose for 6 months. Unluckily, this plan didn't work out.
Withdrawal, part2
Now I was terrified using Zyprexa. I now knew quite much about antipsychotics (but apparently enough) and knew the dose was I high. I went to private doctor where Zyprexa was reduces and switched to Seroquel 300mg (I then used 200mg/night).
Clearly this was a kind of suicide. I probably should have used Zyprexa and but a quickish withdrawal to lower (10mg) dose could have maybe been enough. Luckily, however, this private doctor didn't really tell me much about risks of switching to lowish dose of Seroquel.
Now I kept using Seroquel and I could sleep but first came kind of depression (not motivated to do anything), I used briefly a antidepressant (a week) in a act of desperation but stopped it then from a lowish dose (hugh thanks for my mother for supplying it to me). I also got anxiety and other problems. Later, I noticed tinnitus and some other strange symptoms. I talked these with doctors and with my very supportive mother but no help. Finally, I started taking regular blood sugar tests and noticed my blood sugar levels seemed to be more or less out of control.
So here I'm now. I haven't been able to work for 2 months because of Zyprexa -> Seroquel switch.
I have diabetes or pre-diabetic condition and tinnitus. After reading lots of information from web I now also understand that the latest switch from high-dose Zyprexa to low-dose Seroquel was a kind of suicide.
Too many open dopamine receptors and too much glutamate => cell deaths forever and depression. Too bad noone really didn't want describe anything about use of neuroleptics with me and really wanted to help me.
So I was about ok in 2009 using Seroquel 400mg/night which was reduced to 100mg/night (0mg) after which during 2010 following things has happened: raise of Seroquel to 400mg/night, Peratsin 16mg (3 days), withdrawal to zero in 2 months, 1.5 month of not-using seroquel, Zyprexa 20mg (2 months), Seroquel 200mg/night 2 months.
Prediabetic condition, not-feeling very well and tinnitus. Something wrong with my blood vessels which I now guess is from diabetes. I finally managed to get Seroquel 200 PROLONG recipe which I'm going to use.
The thing is, no-one would have ever tell me that there might be something wrong with my blood sugar levels (or my vessels/veins) unless I have had noticed it myself.
Clearly this was a kind of suicide. I probably should have used Zyprexa and but a quickish withdrawal to lower (10mg) dose could have maybe been enough. Luckily, however, this private doctor didn't really tell me much about risks of switching to lowish dose of Seroquel.
Now I kept using Seroquel and I could sleep but first came kind of depression (not motivated to do anything), I used briefly a antidepressant (a week) in a act of desperation but stopped it then from a lowish dose (hugh thanks for my mother for supplying it to me). I also got anxiety and other problems. Later, I noticed tinnitus and some other strange symptoms. I talked these with doctors and with my very supportive mother but no help. Finally, I started taking regular blood sugar tests and noticed my blood sugar levels seemed to be more or less out of control.
So here I'm now. I haven't been able to work for 2 months because of Zyprexa -> Seroquel switch.
I have diabetes or pre-diabetic condition and tinnitus. After reading lots of information from web I now also understand that the latest switch from high-dose Zyprexa to low-dose Seroquel was a kind of suicide.
Too many open dopamine receptors and too much glutamate => cell deaths forever and depression. Too bad noone really didn't want describe anything about use of neuroleptics with me and really wanted to help me.
So I was about ok in 2009 using Seroquel 400mg/night which was reduced to 100mg/night (0mg) after which during 2010 following things has happened: raise of Seroquel to 400mg/night, Peratsin 16mg (3 days), withdrawal to zero in 2 months, 1.5 month of not-using seroquel, Zyprexa 20mg (2 months), Seroquel 200mg/night 2 months.
Prediabetic condition, not-feeling very well and tinnitus. Something wrong with my blood vessels which I now guess is from diabetes. I finally managed to get Seroquel 200 PROLONG recipe which I'm going to use.
The thing is, no-one would have ever tell me that there might be something wrong with my blood sugar levels (or my vessels/veins) unless I have had noticed it myself.
Withdrawal
First, the dose was reduced to 300mg which I used few months and then the medication was withdrawed using 100mg reductions in doses per month. Finally we hit, 100mg/night and the plan was keep using it for 6 months or so. However, now tried to be without medication for a week, I slept 4-6 hours and had some cognitive problems so it was difficult to do work related tasks and I started using 100mg/night dose again.
Initially I managed to sleep with 100mg/night for a while but then insomnia came back and I couldn't sleep at all. So I went to a private doctor asking for help. These few meetings with doctors shed some light to the
nature of Seroquel medication (antipsychotic!). Sleeping pills offered temporary remedy now. However, the problems continued and in Jorvi they recommended increasing the medication. I has hesitant to to do this and when I did I raised medication less than was ordered (to 200mg) that helped me to sleep.
Because I wasn't taking Seroquel 400mg/night but only 200mg/night I was taken to hospital (I was otherwise about OK, visitng private doctors, just meeting other people previously.)
Now, afterwards I'm really glad that I get into hospital because the good care I was given. I told I was slightly depressed about the withdrawal problems. Because I thought I had had mostly sleeping problems (the wierd dreams and dream-like states + voices didn't never return), I asked whether I we could use temesta that some doctor had proposed. Soon after that I received some kind of aggressive behaviour and I was given Peratsin 16mg (for 3 days) and I was then released from the hospital. (Like I was really so psychotic that I needed it).
Now also my parents (I lke when they want to help) were very supportive of me using Peratsin 16mg as they also were very helpful when I started to use Seroquel. (To my mother's defence she somewhat supported me when I tried to tell the doctor that maybe Seroquel is not the right medication right now and hesitated based on the guts feeling the start of seroquel treatment). Unluckily thought, I got some minor side-effects from the drug like akathesia which lead me to discontinue drug immediately after starting its use.
At this point it seemed that Jorvi was really supportive and helpful to me. I tried to change my place of treatment to Riihimäki instead. Here, the somewhat more unfriendly doctor, asked me did I really started to use seroquel and told I had a really bad destiny ahead of me. He also said I should stop using the street drugs (rather nice, now I'm drug addict...). Anyway, after talking with him for a while it started to be clear that he didn't seem to be very supportive to me. So my treatment was moved back to Jorvi.
This time, however, it was clear that I wasn't properly treated. So I made a mistake of my life and withdraw Seroquel down in 2 months. When I now stopped the medication I could initially sleep almost full fours but for amonth I only slept 4-6 hours per day and was very tired during days (it was summer holiday) I mostly only took a long walks and swam a little an so on. After a month, however, I started to get 8 hours of sleep or something but got strange erection problems and then came some panic attacks (it was clear I wasn't psychotic).
Because of these panic attacks I, however, ran to another hospital. According to the nurse I was okey, but when I returned a doctor (and nurse from, surprise, surprise, from Jorvi) decided to took me in and gave me Zyprexa 20mg + some temesta. (Rather nice, I was clearly NOT psychotic but there was adrenergic problems caused by withdrawal). I had just visited my work place before going to hospital and visited a private doctor all who thought I wasn't psychotic.
In Aurora I then was for two weeks and became depressed about my current situation. Because managed to be fine with Zyprexa, I probably had managed to be OK without any meds too (I was able to sleep without anything).
Initially I managed to sleep with 100mg/night for a while but then insomnia came back and I couldn't sleep at all. So I went to a private doctor asking for help. These few meetings with doctors shed some light to the
nature of Seroquel medication (antipsychotic!). Sleeping pills offered temporary remedy now. However, the problems continued and in Jorvi they recommended increasing the medication. I has hesitant to to do this and when I did I raised medication less than was ordered (to 200mg) that helped me to sleep.
Because I wasn't taking Seroquel 400mg/night but only 200mg/night I was taken to hospital (I was otherwise about OK, visitng private doctors, just meeting other people previously.)
Now, afterwards I'm really glad that I get into hospital because the good care I was given. I told I was slightly depressed about the withdrawal problems. Because I thought I had had mostly sleeping problems (the wierd dreams and dream-like states + voices didn't never return), I asked whether I we could use temesta that some doctor had proposed. Soon after that I received some kind of aggressive behaviour and I was given Peratsin 16mg (for 3 days) and I was then released from the hospital. (Like I was really so psychotic that I needed it).
Now also my parents (I lke when they want to help) were very supportive of me using Peratsin 16mg as they also were very helpful when I started to use Seroquel. (To my mother's defence she somewhat supported me when I tried to tell the doctor that maybe Seroquel is not the right medication right now and hesitated based on the guts feeling the start of seroquel treatment). Unluckily thought, I got some minor side-effects from the drug like akathesia which lead me to discontinue drug immediately after starting its use.
At this point it seemed that Jorvi was really supportive and helpful to me. I tried to change my place of treatment to Riihimäki instead. Here, the somewhat more unfriendly doctor, asked me did I really started to use seroquel and told I had a really bad destiny ahead of me. He also said I should stop using the street drugs (rather nice, now I'm drug addict...). Anyway, after talking with him for a while it started to be clear that he didn't seem to be very supportive to me. So my treatment was moved back to Jorvi.
This time, however, it was clear that I wasn't properly treated. So I made a mistake of my life and withdraw Seroquel down in 2 months. When I now stopped the medication I could initially sleep almost full fours but for amonth I only slept 4-6 hours per day and was very tired during days (it was summer holiday) I mostly only took a long walks and swam a little an so on. After a month, however, I started to get 8 hours of sleep or something but got strange erection problems and then came some panic attacks (it was clear I wasn't psychotic).
Because of these panic attacks I, however, ran to another hospital. According to the nurse I was okey, but when I returned a doctor (and nurse from, surprise, surprise, from Jorvi) decided to took me in and gave me Zyprexa 20mg + some temesta. (Rather nice, I was clearly NOT psychotic but there was adrenergic problems caused by withdrawal). I had just visited my work place before going to hospital and visited a private doctor all who thought I wasn't psychotic.
In Aurora I then was for two weeks and became depressed about my current situation. Because managed to be fine with Zyprexa, I probably had managed to be OK without any meds too (I was able to sleep without anything).
Use of seroquel
Now the dose of Seroquel 400mg/night didn't cause work related problems so I kept using it and it surely solved all problems with sleep. During the first two months my doctors changed and there was some strange comments but I ignored them because the medication didn't seem to cause problems and if it would I would then stop it. After 3 months I also asked about withdrawal because I felt I was quite fine but the doctors wanted me to keep using the Seroquel.
This use of Seroquel took much longer than anticipated. The doctors didn't talk much about withdrawal so I kept using it. During this time period (2 years) I got another job, travelled abroads (work related), started playing piano and had a healthy lifestyle going gym 2-3 times a week.
Finally, my dear friend, the doctor from Jorvi hospital agreed with me when I asked whether we could discontinue using the drug.
This use of Seroquel took much longer than anticipated. The doctors didn't talk much about withdrawal so I kept using it. During this time period (2 years) I got another job, travelled abroads (work related), started playing piano and had a healthy lifestyle going gym 2-3 times a week.
Finally, my dear friend, the doctor from Jorvi hospital agreed with me when I asked whether we could discontinue using the drug.
Diagnosis
Later I had also passing memory problems and confusion, but luckily I was in good hands at Jorvi. I had some trciky sleeping problems and was prescribed to have sleeping pills. However, being to most wise here I avoided to use them because they were addictive. Getting into sleep was difficult and there was some strange dream-like states and voices inside my head. This was something I haven't never experienced before and somewhat scary. However, once I managed to get into sleep I slept quite well (8 hours or so). Also these problems didn't seem to go away and although they weren't that bad they were disturbing. Before the insidence with alcohol + some pills (turned out to be oxamin) I haven't have had any problems with sleep.
During days I was quite ok and although I wasn't working I tried to do some work related tasks and visited my work place etc. The problems didn't go away and I wasn't 100% in working condition so my status was followed. Also the sleeping related problems seemed to increase some inner voices that I have had sometimes but haven't (except under of excessive stress lately) caused any problems. I managed to graduate (M.Sc.) and work in both private and public sector.
Finally, my friend, the doctor, offered me some Seroquel. Similarly to sleeping pills my first reaction was that I didn't want to use it (I didn't know much about anything about medications but at some level I sensed I shouldn't use something like this). However, the problems continued (although I was able to do everyday tasks and managed to do some work although the sleeping problems continued to harass me).
Back then I didn't know about other options and if I had I should have had went to see a private neurologists specialized in sleep. What I can now understand there was some damage to GABA receptors which caused problems and therefore potentiated some almost non-existing problems I have had before. I could sleep without medications it was just tricky so with proper supportive measures and time (to heal receptor damage) I could have been saved. However, back then I didn't understood any of this.
The doctor told me that I could try it and then discontinue it later.So after reading from the web that it is sometimes also used for sleep I decided to give it a go. Admittely, seroquel was very sleepy and it solved all the problems (no dreams, no nothing) and it doesn't cause serious problems that would have affected my work performance or private life so I decided to use it for awhile.
During days I was quite ok and although I wasn't working I tried to do some work related tasks and visited my work place etc. The problems didn't go away and I wasn't 100% in working condition so my status was followed. Also the sleeping related problems seemed to increase some inner voices that I have had sometimes but haven't (except under of excessive stress lately) caused any problems. I managed to graduate (M.Sc.) and work in both private and public sector.
Finally, my friend, the doctor, offered me some Seroquel. Similarly to sleeping pills my first reaction was that I didn't want to use it (I didn't know much about anything about medications but at some level I sensed I shouldn't use something like this). However, the problems continued (although I was able to do everyday tasks and managed to do some work although the sleeping problems continued to harass me).
Back then I didn't know about other options and if I had I should have had went to see a private neurologists specialized in sleep. What I can now understand there was some damage to GABA receptors which caused problems and therefore potentiated some almost non-existing problems I have had before. I could sleep without medications it was just tricky so with proper supportive measures and time (to heal receptor damage) I could have been saved. However, back then I didn't understood any of this.
The doctor told me that I could try it and then discontinue it later.So after reading from the web that it is sometimes also used for sleep I decided to give it a go. Admittely, seroquel was very sleepy and it solved all the problems (no dreams, no nothing) and it doesn't cause serious problems that would have affected my work performance or private life so I decided to use it for awhile.
Precondition
Back in 2007 I had some minor stress related issues related to my work and decided to talk to doctor with my problems. I have had some minor anxiety which related to few unwise emails which further increased the problems. Now, although the emails itself were quite harmless it could have been grown into bloody mess with 30.000 EUR or more fines and other problems. I wasn't feeling quite fine so I went to see a doctor.
Luckily, the doctor immediately noticed I was indeed suffering from serious mental health problems although it didn't seem to affect my work performance as scientist or my private life (although admittely there wasn't much of it because my genuine interest in science and work).
He first tried to schedule me to see a psychologist but my insurance didn't cover it so he wrote me some pills for anxiety/sleep and sent me to Jorvi hospital where I met this young doctor. I talked with her and she wanted to see me again on the next monday. I didn't think it was much point seeing her but agreed anyway.
Next there was weekend and because of stress I decided to use good old-fashioned alcohol to relax my nerves. I met a pretty girl how was going to party and joined her. This was something very rare of me as I used to use only modest amounts of alcohol and only when meeting clients or when in some job-related social meetings. However, being completely ignorant about medicines. After going home I took some of the pills (they were in a white envelope with no instructions how to use). This clearly was unwise because they I got some breathing problems and on the next day there was much increased temporal anxiety and panic.
Luckily, the doctor immediately noticed I was indeed suffering from serious mental health problems although it didn't seem to affect my work performance as scientist or my private life (although admittely there wasn't much of it because my genuine interest in science and work).
He first tried to schedule me to see a psychologist but my insurance didn't cover it so he wrote me some pills for anxiety/sleep and sent me to Jorvi hospital where I met this young doctor. I talked with her and she wanted to see me again on the next monday. I didn't think it was much point seeing her but agreed anyway.
Next there was weekend and because of stress I decided to use good old-fashioned alcohol to relax my nerves. I met a pretty girl how was going to party and joined her. This was something very rare of me as I used to use only modest amounts of alcohol and only when meeting clients or when in some job-related social meetings. However, being completely ignorant about medicines. After going home I took some of the pills (they were in a white envelope with no instructions how to use). This clearly was unwise because they I got some breathing problems and on the next day there was much increased temporal anxiety and panic.
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